Bath time is a necessary evil. From the time I brought my baby boy home over a year ago, I have hated bath time. The following are my many observations of bath time and why it is the absolute WORST!
- FEAR: You are so excited to bring baby home, and if you are a first time parent, you are probably a little scared too. People are sending you home with a tiny human that you are expected to keep alive. One of the major things you must do is give this small, wrinkly, crying thing a bath. At this point you are barely able to bathe yourself let alone this tiny baby who you think you will break!
- EQUIPMENT: As a first time parent, I thought I needed all of the fancy baby bathing equipment, fancy tub, water thermometer, 20 million wash cloths, and the best baby soap. First off, it takes 20 minutes just to set up the baby bath and all the equipment mentioned above. While you are setting up, one of the following has happened: baby has finally fallen asleep, baby is ravished with hunger and you must feed him, or your significant other has decided it is cuddle time and you don’t want to interrupt that.
- PEE: After 20 minutes of getting everything set up and getting the bath water to just the right temperature, you set baby into the tub and it is inevitable that baby will let it all go and you will have to start all over. It is best to be prepared with a “pee cloth.” This is what my husband calls the wash cloth he uses to “catch” the pee.
- POOP: This is every parent’s worst nightmare. That is really all I have to say about that.
- JEALOUSY: As you are giving your baby a bath, all you can think about is how much you wish you could take a bath….but deep down you know what a disaster that would be. The minute you hit that nice warm bath water you will start leaking breast milk and soon the water will be that milky white color that is all the rage for maternity photo shoots, but instead of a beautiful, glowing pregnant woman you are a tired and disheveled postpartum mom and no one wants to see that. So you pull yourself out of that fantasy and settle for a quick two-minute shower during the 15 minutes the baby decides to sleep without you having to hold him.
- MESSES: As baby gets bigger and moves from the baby bath to being able to sit in the big tub, you think bath time will get easier, no more equipment set up and tear down; but now the big messes start. Splashing, wet baby toys being thrown from the tub, and the inevitable baby bubble escape. It feels like trying to clean your child results in an even bigger mess!
- Then this happens…..
- NAKED TIME: Everyone thinks it is so cute to let a baby crawl/run around after bath time until baby pees or poops on the floor.
- REMEMBERING: Mom brain is a real thing and one of the things I commonly forget is that I need to give my kid a bath. If it wasn’t for my husband reminding me about bath time, my kid would be lucky to get a bath once a week.
- OVER BATHING: This is a real thing and is opposite of the problem I have. At the beginning though, I thought baby needed lots of baths. NOT TRUE! This only leads to dried out and itchy skin, which then leads to a crabby, itchy baby!
The reasons for hating bath time have changed as baby gets older and I’m sure they will continue to change and I will still hate bath time even after he can start bathing himself. For now I have made my husband in charge of bath time and I get to enjoy the best part, the smell of a freshly cleaned and lotion-covered baby! My dog, however, seems to enjoy every part of bath time with baby!